Triplet Discrimination

In September, the triplets started swimming lessons - their first ever "class" of any kind. They were all in the same level, as it was the first time in lessons for any of them.

Hayden struggled a bit, and when the session ended, and they all passed, I have to admit - I was a bit surprised. I couldn't help but wonder, did he pass because he actually met all of the requirements? Or did he pass because his brother and sister did, and the teacher didn't want him to be left behind??

I left that class feeling weird. That was the first time I have ever wondered if the fact that they are triplets, affected the way another person treated them.

The next week, they started another session of swimming lessons, the next level up. This time, they had a different instructor. This lady bugged me from the start. She was ALWAYS calling them "The Triplets".

Calling them "the triplets", doesn't necessarily bug me. In fact, I call them "the triplets". I use it when I am talking about them as a group, just like I will say "the girls" or "the boys" or "the kids". But it was the way she said it that bugged me - like she was introducing a circus act or something: "Oh look! The Triplets are here!!"

Anyways, throughout the second session, Cole excelled, while Kadance and Hayden did pretty good. I thought they would all pass - Cole for sure!

I was shocked when I got their report cards at the end, and NONE of them passed. I looked over the criteria, and agreed that Kadance and Hayden might not be able to do the few things they missed (all the same things by the way....hmmm...). But when I looked over the few things that Cole didn't have checked off, I disagreed. I KNEW he could do these things. I also knew his instructor didn't check these things off, because she didn't want to pass him, and not the other two. I just knew, that is the kind of person she came across as. And it bugged me. It still bugs me.

I could have talked to her, made a big stink, but I didn't. I let it go, and now I stew about it. I am NOT a confrontational person - definitely a hindrance in situations like these.

I really bugs me that she held Cole back, simply because she viewed him and "one of three". Like at the grocery store, when there are boxes of granola bars on sale - "buy 3 boxes for $2.00 each. Less than full groups $2.50 each." So you buy all 3 boxes. Not because you necessarily need all three boxes, but because you feel like you have to buy all three.

I feel like my children were discriminated against, because they are triplets. And I don't like it. I always used to say that if I put the triplets in school, I would want them all in the same class. It would be easier - one teacher to deal with, one class party to attend, etc. But now, I am not so sure. I am now realizing the negative aspect of having triplets. The way other people view/treat them. And it's hard. It's hard as a mother to watch my son, who LOVES and excels at swimming, to be held back simply because he has 2 same age siblings.

So, for now at least, I am further rooted in my reasons for homeschooling. I can teach my children like the individuals they are, NOT as a group.

I have also decided I need to be more forward - the next time I put the kids in swimming lessons (probably May/June), I am going to talk to the instructor before the first class, and request that she treat them individually - if one deserves to pass and the others don't, then pass that one, just like you would for any other single kids. It's sad that I feel the need to do that, but unfortunately, I do.